I love my class July 2, 2009

A glimpse of how frustrated and angry and confused I was two days ago:

 

“Every time I sit down at the table and tell myself that this time, THIS TIME I will conquer the impossible task of understanding what the Geography syllabus requires me to study, I end up more frustrated than ever.

 I just CAN’T seem to do it. It’s so confusing. I have all the information on my hands(more than what I probably need) but I don’t know which fit into the syllabus and which don’t. I don’t know what process or theories are considered ‘key processes’. It’s all so vague.

 

I know I’ve got to be responsible for my own learning and ensuring that I know what I need to do, but fact is, I have no clue what the terms in the syllabus mean. They’re not technical terms, they’re too generic. All the information in this world could fit in the categories stated, especially since I don’t remember learning any of those concepts at all. (Yes I know I’m forgetful, but I FORGET FACTS quickly, I usually remember concepts after I’ve heard them once. And even if I don’t, they should at least sound familiar to me. They don’t.)

 

I’m spending 80% of my revision time figuring out what I need to study for the subject, rather than actually STUDYING for the subject itself. What a waste. And then by then I’ll be so angry and frustrated and disorientated that I can’t concentrate on studying(REAL STUDYING) for my next subject, CSE, which I should say deserves better treatment since it’s taught in a better fashion.”

 

I was really frazzled when I typed that. Not to say it isn’t true.

 

But I just realised how much I LOVE my class. I have awesome classmates and they always make school better for me. It’s motivating to go to school, not to see people studying(like my class last year), but instead to see then just sitting there stoning, then slowly awaken from their half asleep state and begin making jokes with puns and random issues. And then the whole class starts laughing along, and so on. I wouldn’t say I can click with everyone 100%, but I’m happy that at least I feel accepted in class, and that they don’t leave me out or split into exclusive cliques.

 

I still remember how I couldn’t click with my OG mates, and I was so miserable for that entire week, thinking that I would have no friends for my entire JC life. And yet my class changed EVERYTHING. It wasn’t a gradual process too. It was pretty immediate, when I realised that I could relate and be accepted in my class more easily than in my OG. It only took one activity for me to arrive at my conclusion. It was our first class-bonding activity and it was, like most, amazing race style. Instead of being ultra competitive and making everyone rush to places to get the top class award, everyone didn’t mind walking(or strolling) just so we could relax and enjoy the activity more. And I DID enjoy the activity, because I didn’t feel controlled for the first time I participated in a structured game.

 

I think my class is something I have to be thankful for.

 

We probably don’t get along ALL THE TIME, and I’m not eliminating the possibility of class politics(though I’m usually not aware of it anyway). I don’t even know if we’re that bonded. But what matters to me is that I feel accepted, at the very least, and I’m amongst liberal people, who I can probably get along with better than conservative people, even though I may not be THAT liberal. In my previous class, I always felt that I had to suppress my views, unless I was with Angela or Prisia.

 

Also, there isn’t anyone attempting to exert any form of control, dominance or ‘leadership’ on the class. We do have people volunteering to lead certain discussions, but they’re flexible and receptive and open to new ideas. They aren’t the rigid, must-have-discipline ‘leaders’ I encountered so often.

 

So you know what, I realised that there are nice people everywhere. You just have to look for them.